Wednesday, 8 November 2017

Ordinary heart. . .

But I'll give it more than anybody. . . 

Baby I don't want to lead you on
Feed you empty promises and not follow through
There's a lot of things that I do wrong
If you're looking for the perfect one this ain't for you

When people seek you out, whether intentionally or accidentally, you have to find ways to deter them.
I guess it has more to do with knowing when to give up or let go or move one, whichever seems the more likely of the three outcomes that suits your particular scenario.  When someone has settled their sights on you and they are not part of the plan that you have for yourself, they are not part of the routine that you know derives not only success for you but success for everyone (not just them) then there is no wonder that you might be doing so many things wrong to accommodate their needs and forsaking all of yours. That should be a sign already that this is not something worth pursuing.

'Cause what I've got is just an ordinary heart
But I'll give it more than anybody
You can always trust this ordinary heart

What kind of heart do you have?
An ordinary heart implies that it is something that is simple, uncluttered, untroubled and clear.
An ordinary heart implies that it is open to being bruised and battered, thrown around and tested for its resilience.  An ordinary heart implies that there is nothing sinister, nothing secret, nothing hidden that could obscure your view about what is inside.  You are under no illusion about what this ordinary heart can bring.  If you can trust this ordinary heart, it is for all of these reasons and more - that tell you that transparency and honesty live in this ordinary heart.  

Maybe I don't want to let you down
Tell you that I'll always be around and miss my cue
I can be a lover and a fool
Every now and then I lose my cool that's what I do

When you don't want to let people down, you have to consider whether in the act of not letting them down, that you don't let yourself down.  You should not be sacrificing yourself in the process.  If there are things and other people that you should be attending to - make some tough decisions.  The number one person that you need to look out for you is yourself, particularly if you're the type of person that people normally gravitate towards.  You can try to keep yourself together and be the understanding type, but do people not understand that there is a limit?  That you are not a well of unlimited indulgence, that there is a point at which you need to be able to replenish yourself without losing yourself.

'Cause what I've got is just an ordinary heart
But I'll give it more than anybody
You can always trust this ordinary heart

When you give your heart so freely or make it freely available because you care so much, you must be prepared to either have it bruised and hurt.  I think once you learn resilience and learn not to care so much, at your own expense, this is a much better state to be in.  We can often spend far too much time worrying about things we cannot control, worrying about feelings that we cannot shift, especially if they belong to others - and people can't help the way they feel - that's what free will is all about.  The choices they make that either make your heart rejoice, or choices that break your heart into a million pieces.  If you know that you cannot love someone the way they deserve to be loved, then the best you can do is let them go and live your own life and stop sabotaging their chance at happiness.  Which heart would you trust?  An ordinary heart that has no secrets or an extraordinary heart that keeps you guessing all the time?

I know you're scared that I might change

Or even worse I'll stay the same, I'll stay the same

You might be seeking reassurance or some sort of signal that people don't change.  That promises kept will never be broken and allegiances sworn that are untested by time.  What if people don't stay the same even though they promised?  What if, even worse - you start to change yourself?  What we are most scared of is the inability to gain in love, because we have so much to lose if we engage in it - self respect, pride, self esteem, faith, hope - all of it - so we must be careful who we choose to hold our hearts.  I guess that's what makes it ordinary or extraordinary isn't it?  That no matter what happens, what scenarios or situations seem to come your way - you can always count on how your own heart will behave - or not.  You should be more scared of yourself changing into someone you might not recognise.  
'Cause what I've got is just an ordinary heart
But I'll give it more than anybody
You can always trust this ordinary heart

I hope that you are able to be in healthy relationships, rather than situationships.
That ship shouldn't even be docked at your bay.  Push it out to sea, or better yet, stop being a lighthouse that signals to them that you're nearby so that they stop. Let them crash on the rocks instead.  No point in setting out in rough seas if they're going to keep relying on others to save them all the time.  A good sailor or a  seasoned captain knows when to venture out or not.  Take it from someone who knows more than they shouldn't in this regard.  You can always trust this ordinary heart. . .