Thursday, 20 July 2017

Don't explain. . .

There ain't nothin' to gain. . . 

Have you been in this situation?
Has someone been unfaithful to you? Maybe you've been the unfaithful one?
Cheating is a very straightforward and simple thing.  Isn't it?  You're with someone, but then you choose to be with someone else.  Why can't we be monogamous and be faithful to one person?  What compels us to seek solace outside of our committed relationships?  Why is it that even after we make promises and vows to be with someone for the rest of our lives, we then decide to be with someone else at the same time?  There are different stories - you fall into things by accident, like you slip and fall on someone and then you really start to notice that they're there, when you didn't really notice before.  You might have someone who has had premeditated designs on you for some time, but you didn't know until it was too late and you became ensnared in their trap.  You might be the predator, who hunts specific personality types that excite you, the fact that you don't know any better because this is how you've always been - how you've always behaved so why change now?

Hush now, don't explain
There ain't nothin' to gain
I'm glad that you're back
Don't explain

There isn't anything to gain from someone who cheats on you.
We learn from an early age about fidelity and what it means to be committed to someone.
Why do we subject ourselves to accepting people who treat us this way?
Why do we hurt our loved ones by doing this?  Why would they not want to hear any explanations?
There's nothing worth explaining because the damage has been done hasn't it?
I'm not judging here.  Just able to see it from both sides of the fence.  What must it feel like for both sides?  Unless you've been on the receiving end of either side, you don't know what it feels like, what it really feels like.

Quiet baby don't explain
There is nothin' to gain
Skip that, lipstick 
Don't explain

What would you do if you found lipstick on your man's collar?
Might be a number on the phone, a text message, an email, hidden pictures.
How can you gloss over that lip gloss you found in the glove box that you know doesn't belong to you?  Can't gain anything from explanations because the evidence is too strong.  Can't gain anything from talking about the lipstick, so you skip it.

You know that I love you
And what love endures
All my thoughts are of you
For I'm so completely yours

Do you think that the reason you accepted being cheated on, is because you think that your love is enough for the both of you?  Maybe that might happen.  He or she might come to their senses and realise, you were always the one.  That the reason why you did the things you did was because you thought you couldn't be part of a love that endured.  You didn't realise that he or she could have thoughts that were only of you.  Did you not ask?  How did you not know?  Did you think that you weren't worthy of such love?

Don't want to hear nobody chatter
'Cause I know you cheat
Right and wrong don't matter
When you're with me, my sweet

Behind closed doors, behind hands that cover mouths that hide the words that spill out talking about you.  How do you handle it?  You know they cheat.  Everyone knows they cheat.  Yet you still hang on.  You might think that having pieces of them is enough, that you don't need their whole body, mind or heart - you would be happy with but just one of those parts - as long as you get your little now and then.  Is this enough for you?  Is this the kind of love that endures that you had pictured in your mind?  As I write this, the words flow onto the screen and my fingers don't know what it is writing.  These thoughts that leap out in front of you as you read, surprise even me no less.  Maybe this is what cheating feels like.  You are compelled to just do it.  There is no reasonable explanation that would be enough to assuage that pain that you feel from finding out lies that have covered behaviour you didn't sign up for.  Yet you are willing to accept what little scraps of affection you are being fed like goldfish in a bowl, circling lazily because you know that fish food eventually comes with minimal effort on your part.

Hush now don't explain
Don't you know
You're my joy and you're my pain?
My life is yours love
Don't explain

I hope that you never have to experience such heartache.
You think it's stuff that only happens in the movies, but it's real stuff.  It happens to real people.
There are real secrets out there that are hidden in plain sight.  People don't know how hard they need to look, not very hard as a matter of fact.  What do we hope to gain by exposing such secrets?  Who needs to learn such truths from uncouth youths?  Nobody really.  How can a person be the source of both your joy and your pain?  Who gave them this power?  To be honest, I don't even know why this is the topic of this blog post.  I guess it doesn't really matter does it?  You don't really need to know,  So I won't.  You could say, hey, hush now don't explain. . .