Saturday, 3 June 2017

Everybody hurts. . .

When you need to remember that you're not alone. . . 

When your day is long
And the night, the night is yours alone
When you're sure you've had enough of this life
Well hang on
Don't let yourself go
'Cause everybody cries
And everybody hurts sometimes

What kind of life are you living that makes you think it's time to let go?
I have often had conversations with my friends, colleagues and strangers (you know the type, the friend that you only just meet and only expect to have them be your friend for a short period of time, like a taxi driver or a fellow passenger on a plane) about life.  The usual conversations with friends will often be picking up on threads of conversation from the last time you spoke or if you're talking to a stranger it might be about what you do for a living and where you are heading to or just leaving from.  I find that when people stop caring or taking interest in your life, when you start to feel ignored or isolated, it is very easy to feel hurt and neglected.  What do you do when you feel this way?  Do you still people how you really feel?

Sometimes everything is wrong
Now it's time to sing along
When your day is night alone (hold on)
(Hold on) if you feel like getting go (hold on)
If you think you've had too much of this life
Well, hang on

It is easy to feel like letting go of life is the easy solution.  But it isn't.  
Everyone I know has been busy posting messages about the popular Netflix series 13 Reasons Why.  Just as popular has been an American high school deciding to counter the notion of this series by having a series of daily morning radio announcements where students share their story and thank someone at school who has helped them overcome their own fears and obstacles and kept them alive.  They named the project 13 Reasons Why Not? 

'Cause everybody hurts
Take comfort in your friends
Everybody hurts 
Don't throw your hand
Oh no
Don't throw your hand
If you feel like you're alone
No, no, no, you're not alone

Do you have friends that you can find comfort in?
I have had friends in the past who would tell me a lot about the things that they were going through, but never deigned to tell their real friends, the people they grew up with, what they were facing because they had this public persona that they needed to uphold.  Why do we punish ourselves in this way?  Is public image so important that we would be prepared to spend time investing in a facade of a life that shows you are able to keep everything together, or should you lay your vulnerability bare, for everyone to see?

If you're on your own in this life
The days and nights are long
When you think you've had too much of this life
Hang on

I meant to post this draft a long time ago, but I always felt as if this song was a bit more challenging to write about than other songs, only because of the potential heaviness I feel while listening to it, and having to carry that around with me during my day seems more than I am willing to bear.  I've also recently been getting back into my songwriting and had a brainwave a few days ago while writing some Samoan ballads and I had forgotten how sometimes I do think too much of this life, and think there is too much going on in this life.  It doesn't make me think however that I don't want to be a part of it.  There are moments I want to escape it or want to get off the merry go round that I seem to be on because people want me on it and keep spinning it without my permission just to see me react.  Why do people do that?  When others delight in your panic or pain - are these types of people worth having around.

Well everybody hurts sometimes
Everybody cries
And everybody hurts sometimes
And everybody hurts sometimes
So, hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on

I hope that you know that it's ok to hurt and feel those feelings.  But it's also important to know that those feelings will come to a natural end, that those times when you are hurting will pass.  We just need to remember to foster our sense of resilience and know when to bounce back, to remove ourselves from the hurt and pain and rejoin a direction for life again, a commitment to momentum and pushing through the hurt and pain.  Surround yourself with people who want the best for you.  Surround yourself with things that make you feel good about life, that brings you the joy of living and help keep you fascinated and connected about the beauty that the world has to offer.  Find those people and things and you will only hurt sometimes.  Not all the time.

Everybody hurts but you are not alone. . .