Tuesday, 28 February 2017

City of stars. . .

Knowing you have once been under the same city of stars. . . 

City of stars
Are you shining just for me?
City of stars
There's just so much that I can't see
Who knows?
I felt it from the first embrace I shared with you
That now our dreams
They've finally come true

You would like to think that when you look up at the night sky that the stars shine for you, even with your troubles and struggles, whatever you seem to be going through in your times of darkness, all of that disappears, when you are under a city of stars.  I have been talking to lots of people lately about the unknown and what it means to be able to move forward, even when things don't seem so certain.  That instead, we just need to be willing to take risks and learn to back ourselves and believe in who we are, what we are capable of doing, even when the world doesn't think we can do anything worthwhile.  You might come across someone who reminds you about this in your life and suddenly you find the corners of your mouth start to pick up and you're able to turn your frown upside down.  Thinking about positive things, about people who matter to you, they'll have that effect on you when you least expect it.

City of stars
Just one thing that everybody wants
There in the bars
And through the smokescreen of the crowded restaurants
It's love
Yes, all we're looking for is love from someone else
A rush
A glance
A touch 
A dance

I'm not writing about this song because of what happened at the Oscars the other night.  No.  As a pianist, I was always drawn to this song in the movie.  Something about the combination of lyrics and the feel of the song, where it changes in all the right places, plays all of the right motifs in all the right spaces, speeds up and slows down exactly where it needs to.  I really enjoy listening to such pieces of music on repeat, long enough so that I let the piano sound ring in my ears, or surround the space that I occupy.  Are you looking for love from someone else?  I'm not sure if ever really find someone when we're looking.  As cheesy as these films may seem, we really do meet people when we least expect.  Think about it.  That person in your life you currently see as a pain in the ass or about to completely write off, they might just turn out to be exactly who you want them to be, who they want you to want them to be.  Who knows when anybody is ever really ready for love, right?

A look in somebody's eyes
To light up the skies
To open the world and send it reeling
A voice that says, I'll be here
And you'll be alright

There's nothing more important than reassurance sometimes.
Often we feel that we need to hear it often.  More often than not, we just need to rely on the self assurance that we carry with us.  By relying on someone to reassure us all the time, how will we ever learn when we can be sure of ourselves?  Don't get me wrong.  It's great to be able to take that look in somebody's eyes when they look at you and use that to light up your dark night skies.  We might even enjoy the chaos that brings, that the look in those eyes does to open our world and send it reeling.  But what cost does it come with us?  Who pays that price?

I don't care if I know
Just where I will go
'Cause all I need is this crazy feeling
A rat-tat-tat on my heart

We might find ourselves in the other extreme, following that path that everybody else expects you to travel down and never really rely on anything that our heart has to tell us.  We become afraid to feel, to know that life is meant to be full of foolhardy mistakes, risks that were meant to be taken and fully taken advantage of, even when it causes our heart to be broken into so many pieces, that when we go to piece it all back together, it hardly resembles anything that would have come from your body.  How are you with this crazy feeling?  Are you able to cope with it?  Somehow I can't help but think that sometimes it's like trying to be a rodeo cowboy, trying to wrangle that steer in the hopes that by holding on for dear life, you'll actually survive this crazy feeling.

City of stars
Are you shining just for me?
City of stars
You never shined so brightly. . . 

I hope that you know that underneath the city of stars that you're in, you can shine just as bright as those stars.  You should remember that no matter what life throws at you, curveballs, hospital passes, line outs, something in the outfield, that you have the stamina to run after that ball, retrieve it and throw it straight it back.  Even if you can't shine brightly enough for yourself, I hope you find someone who does shine brightly so you can see what it looks like to shine bright.  As much as we might think that it's time to be away from those stars, it's also good to revel in the light and know that it's ok to think I want it to stay. . . 

Monday, 27 February 2017

Bright eyes. . .

Why have your eyes suddenly grown so pale?

Is it kind of a dream
Floating out on the tide
Following the river of death downstream
Or is it a dream?
There's a fog along the horizon
A strange glow in the sky
And nobody seems to know where it goes
And what does it mean?
Oh, is it a dream?

I've been having lots of dreams lately.  People around me have been having lots of dreams too.  The thing about dreams that can be quite mystifying is when you aren't able to make sense of the symbolism that seems to be loaded heavily in there and now knowing exactly what everything means.  People always want to know things for sure, to know things for certain.  But life doesn't deal things out for sure, for certain.  It's up to you to make sense of what life deals to you and then judge for yourself whether you accept what you see or choose to ignore it.  When something is ignored, you can decide how you feel about that, whether to make a big scene about it or just carry on with more important things in your life.  Who knows there things go and what it all means?  Maybe we're just not ready to see the truth.

Bright eyes, burning like fire
Bright eyes, how can you close and fail?
How can the light that burned so brightly
Suddenly burn so pale
Bright eyes

When you come across eyes that burn bright, how do they make you feel?
Are you able to see what your own eyes do?  Do they burn brightly as they stare back at you in the mirror?  What does it mean when your bright eyes close and fail?  Did you set such lofty goals for yourself that you overshot the mark and in fact, can't do what you set out to do?  The music of this track give you a quite soothing reassurance, despite the uncertainty of the lyrics that give you little reassurance at all.  Why do we close ourselves off from what's going on in our lives?  Are our dreams more exciting to live by than our current reality?  I guess if we really wanted to, we could try to see what our current reality would look like if we made some decisions that could blend the two together.

Is it a kind of a shadow
Reaching into the night
Wandering over the hills unseen
Or is it a dream?
There's a high wind in the trees
A cold sound in the air
And nobody ever knows when you go
And where do you start?
Oh into the dark

I would like to think that there are some things you are able to hold for yourself that you haven't disclosed to anyone.  When people think that they know you, they may only get to see and experience the pieces of you that you have allowed them to see.  Sometimes it's important to fiercely guard other thoughts and feelings you have because it might be too much for the world to see and hear.  They won't be able to deal with it.  They might not know how to react to it.  They might even treat you differently.  And it won't even be because what you have to think or feel is hurtful, they just don't know how to deal with your truth.  Why it's best for your thoughts and feelings to be kept in the dark I suppose.

Bright eyes, burning like fire
Bright eyes, how can you close and fail?
How can the light that burned so brightly
Suddenly burn so pale
Bright eyes

I hope that if your bright eyes suddenly burn so pale, that you are able to find ways to make them burn bright again.  Not for others, just for you.  I think we can often feel that we need to be all things to people so much so more than we need to be for ourselves.  We like to think that we need to be strong and keep ourselves together because people expect us to be there for them.  But we just need to remember that it's ok to not be ok.  It's ok to burn pale, because it's just honest and real, genuine and authentic to how you are thinking and feeling right now.  I guess people that know you well will know, that even when your eyes are pale, they won't be for long; because even though you have bright eyes, it's just as ok to have ones that suddenly burn so pale. . . 

Thursday, 23 February 2017

It's only natural. . .

Late night musings in the quake city. . . 

Ice will melt, water will boil
You and I can shake off this mortal coil
It's bigger than us
You don't have to worry about it
Ready or not here comes the drop
You feel lucky when you know where you are
You know it's gonna come true
Here in your arms I remember

Having connections with someone stems from a willingness to have a shared experience that creates a bond that cannot be broken.  The only reason such bonds will be broken is because there is some stress that puts pressure on a situation that pushes the connection, test its strength and reveals it to be a mortal coil with all of its foibles that are deeply embedded in individual hearts. When curiosity rears its head, it's usually because you miss things that have become familiar to you both and the sense of peace that seems to pervade all other areas of your life, seems to be because of the joy that comes from acceptance of exploring such curiosity.  As we get older we forget or lose our sense of curiosity.  We get swept up in the busy hectic things that we feel we must do, those pesky obligations that steal your time and keep you tied to that mortal coil.

It's only natural that I should want to 

Be there with you
It's only natural that you should
Feel the same way too

Being natural is much more preferable to me than being normal.
When people talk about making something normal, it's about placing or imposing their own judgement and assessment of what they deem something to be, rather than taking into account what you might see it as.  Do you want to be somewhere else with someone else?  I can think of several dozen people who I would love to spend time with right now, but duty, purpose and life keeps me away from where I would like to go.  I'm not resentful of that either.  I think people need to remember that there is always hope, there is always opportunity to be where you want to be, if you work hard now to make your future happen, when you embrace the architect of your own design.

It's easy when you don't try 
Going on first impressions
Man in a cage has made his confession
You've seen me at my worst
And it won't be the last time I'm down there
I want you to know I feel completely at ease
Read me like a book
That's fallen down between your knees
Please let me have my way with you

I am grateful for people who have seen me at my worst.  Granted there are only a select few who have had the privilege, because I am fiercely protective of myself.  I mean, who else better to protect you, than you right?  There will be a small group of people that you are willing to be vulnerable with and it's important to stay connected with these individuals.  I have friends who say I can read them like a book and it's not because they are easy to read people. but because I can listen to them without really have to comprehend the actual words as such, but definitely by the way that they say the words.

It's circumstantial, it's nothing written in the sky
And we don't even have to try
Shaking like mud, buildings like glass
Sink into the bay they'll be under the rocks again
You don't have to say that you know I'm afraid

The best thing about something about being natural, is that there is no pretence, there is nothing that you need to hide and conceal; you are just able to be completely yourself - whatever that feels like to you.  As we grow older, we become more set in our ways of being and maybe even we consider ourselves to be masters of our domains (yes I use plural because for some of us, our domains are many) and we might need to remember that as much as we think that we know something, there is still so much more to learn about ourselves and others we choose to live life with us and for those who we work with, complete with life challenges and all.
I hope that however life is panning out for you right now, that you trust in the surroundings that are natural to you - whether it's returning to what you have always done and felt like "home" to you or whether you choose to surround yourself with people who appreciate what you natural state is like.  I am fortunate to know people who allow me to be natural, complete with warts and all, an it is with these people that I treasure and cherish.  I always bear in mind, that it's what I feel in my heart and soul that I value and love that gets me through the most difficult times in my life.  It's circumstantial, it's something I was born to; it's only natural, can't help it if I want to. . . 

Tuesday, 21 February 2017

I was here. . .

For the times when I want the world to know I was here for a reason. . . 

I want to leave my footprints on the sand of time
Know there was something that, something that I left behind
When I leave this world, I'll leave no regrets 
Leave something to remember, so they won't forget

The introduction of the song seems quite jarring to me, because I'm not sure whether there will be a connection to what is to follow.  Sometimes songs don't need to follow some kind of formulaic existence, but the beauty of its ambiguity can just help to ease people into the song before the weight of the message becomes apparent.  I must say, I wasn't familiar with this song until only a few days ago but I've been playing it on repeat, on a constant loop because there's just something about the weight of the message that makes me feel like the words seep so much into my bones and speaks to my divine purpose.  Have you ever felt that way about a song.  That you sometimes think that you don't necessarily need to comprehend anything but that the song has some kind of energy about it that inhabits your soul.  This is how I feel about this song.

I was here, I lived, I loved, I was here
I did, I've done, everything that I wanted
And it was more than I thought it would be
I will leave you my mark, my soul, everyone will know, I was here

I think I am becoming a master of my mind.
I am learning to be more in tune with thinking about things that will be able to have maximum impact for others because I understand that I am here to be a conduit for change.  I can often be met with  resistance by others and that's totally fine.  Sometimes people don't have the ears to hear what I'm saying or trying to explain.  They're just not ready.  I think I have eventually been able to do what I have always wanted because it has come to me through destiny.  When I have asked people questions for clarification to understand their position, they aren't able to answer, which leads me to believe that they don't know for sure, what their positions are, but even worse, the positions they hold and maintain, are tenuous at best, ridiculous at worst.

I wanna say I lived each day until I died
You know that I, been something in, somebody's life
The hearts I have touched  will be the proof that I leave
That I made a difference and this world will see

When you are in a world where people don't accept you at face value, and even if they do, they don't tend to see past anything else but their own assumptions at their end of their nose, accepting their rejection of you is part of your life learning journey.  I think about things like feeling pain.  Despite it being something hurts, but I have learned to get comfortable in that space, to be aware of my surroundings, trying to understand how I got here and why there are these people around me who feel the same way or not.  Being completely conscious of everything around you is pretty intense because it might be hard to switch everything off.  When people know how to relax and participate in recreational activities, they do so because they choose to prepare for a good time, and surrendering to the joys that will spring forth from that activity.  They set about just feeling good, rather than overthinking about all of the logistical minute details.  I don't want to mean something in somebody's life to be famous.  I would rather serve as a human resource for people to unlock their true selves.  I want to make this difference in the world to make the world better than it is.  I don't need the world to see.  I just need its people to know for themselves how great they can be if they achieve the best of their strengths and abilities, gifts and talents.

I was here, I lived, I loved, I was here
I did, I've done, everything that I wanted
And it was more than I thought it would be
I will leave my mark so that everyone will know

I remember when I was a little kid in church and I'm not exactly sure where we picked this up from, but I remember etching "I was here" on the church pews or etching our names (or someone else's name if we were clever enough, so that they would get in trouble not us!).  This made me think about how we might use our cunning to push other people forward to avoid detection about our true intentions, which in some cases that I have seen, may be less than honourable.  Can you even possibly do everything you ever wanted in this life?  I guess this is why we need to get busy living or get busy dying.  Sometimes the death of someone close to us, can prompt us to live our best lives or immobilise us and keep us in a state of shock that our friends can't free us from.  It is painful to watch sometimes.  When you see people in prisons of their own creation because they can't anything else.  They don't see the greatness that I can see in them.

I just want them to know 
That I gave my all, did my best 
Brought someone some happiness
Left this world a little better just because, I was here

When you are in a position to do your all and give your best - do you give your all and do your best?  I think everyone is smart enough to know when someone works tirelessly, constantly putting others first so that others can experience what they acknowledge could possibly be taken for granted if they're not mindful.  Would you like to think that you give someone happiness?  If you had the power to make someone happy, would you?  So many first world problems are because we can too easily fall into that fickle state of selfishness that leads to self centredness and moving away from being a centred self that can also help others to centre their own selves.  When we are hurt by the world, bruised by its abuse in all of its forms, it is little wonder that we might become self centred and choose to not contribute to anything else for the greater good.  It all comes down to choice doesn't it?

I was here, I lived, I loved, I was here
I did, I've done, everything that I wanted
And it was more than I thought it would be
I will leave my mark so that everyone will know

I hope that you experience the feeling of enjoying something being more or better than you ever thought possible.  What marks do you want to leave behind?  What legacy will you leave for others to continue.  The best contributions to the world are always things or concepts, visions or ideas that help to bring people together, help to celebrate the best that humanity hoped it would achieve for future generations.  I hope you watch this video carefully.  I watched it and cried because it felt like it was easy to feel like you can't make a difference to the tragedies that other people face on the other side of the world and it's easy to feel like helpless when you are so physically far away.  But being helpless means more than being in a weak and vulnerable position like some damsel in distress, in fact I often see that helpless people are those who are actually, actively willing to help. less.  Yes.  Really.  How have we arrived at this point where we help less?  We have a long way to go, but man, if we took the journey together and honestly wanted to do good in this world, we would then be able to not only do everything we wanted, but do more than we ever thought possible.  Imagine that world we could live in together.  Makes you smile doesn't it?

Pure and simple.

I would know why you were here.
And you would know why I was here. . . 

Love letters. . .

To all the lovers of love letters. . . 
Dedicated to Sitina Cowley-Semeatu - sharing memories of our widow journey as sisters in law. . . 

Have you ever written love letters to your beloved?
When you're young, you might have passed notes to someone that you were interested in during grade school/primary school/elementary school and those are the times that you would remember the most. Those first impressions of love you carry with you in your heart for a long time, and you probably lock away those romantic notions of fairytale romance until you meet someone who is able to embody those storybook tales our teachers encouraged us to read.

Fast forward to high school and you might remember when those notes became even harder to write and you wrote those secret love letters to the object of your affection, but never actually passed it on for fear of rejection.  Instead you hid these love letters in your locker and contemplate the perfect moment to pass it on, whether it was leading up to asking them out to some dance and then thinking about how it would feel to be open with your love.  We torture ourselves doing stuff like this, but it's all part of the human condition isn't it and what makes us feel excited about the pursuit of happiness that comes from when we seek to have love in our lives.

Love letters straight from your heart
Keep us so near while apart 
I'm not alone in the night
When I can have all the love you write

When I have received love letters from people's hearts it has always fascinated me.
There is something quite magical about being on the receiving end of someone who has taken the time to put their feelings on paper, thinking about you all the while as they write.  Do you read words over and over that someone writes and then instantly feel comforted?  There aren't many words that people can write that can make me feel a certain type of way, but when it does happen, I know it stems from the fact that maybe I might have developed some feelings for them.  I guess this is why they say that the pen is mightier than the sword; it has the power to break your heart wide open when you least expect.

I memorise every line
And I kiss the name that you sign
And darling then I read again right from the start
Love letters straight from your heart

Have you kept the love letters that you have received?
I keep what I have received but they live in boxes somewhere around the place.  Old diary entries tell me about the love letters.  It makes me smile.  It's like I'm reading my own critique about what the letters say and how I felt about receiving them at the time.  To think and reflect about how I would feel when I read them again from the start is entertaining.  I say entertaining not in a condescending way but I think about how much I've grown since then and I wonder if my feelings have evolved and if I hold onto such romantic notions again or forgotten how I even feel anymore?

I hope that when you think about the love letters that you've received or even recalled the love letters you've written but never given to its intended recipient, that you take into account what kinds of things that love letters are meant to do.  What do you think love letters are meant to express?  Sometimes we think too much about what we see on the page, rather than see what hasn't been said.  So in spite of it all, all I know is, make the most of the love letters that find their way into your hands.  Thank you to all who have written me love letters over the years.  Whether you regret writing them or not because of what transpired afterwards, just know that in one point in time, that I memorise every line, love letters straight from your heart, love letters straight from your heart. . . 

Monday, 20 February 2017

Fruitcake. . .

For all the fruitcakes out there. . . you know who you are. . .
Liana Vaipa-Rice - child of one of my closest high school friends - love your music niecey xx

Yeah woah ooh hmm
I'm a little bit of a hermit
I enjoy the solitude
With my family by my side I find comfort
Within the four walls of my room
I see enough of people everyday
Different types in every way
And I adore them but my spare time is meant for you

There's nothing wrong with a little solitude.
If you can't be with yourself, on your own, it needs to be something that you need to work on.  In the stillness you'll be able to figure out who you are and reflect on things that you've done and what you've said, how you feel about life right now and how you interact with others.  Are you able to rely on your family for the comfort that you need, with family members who are able to pick you up when you need them in your corner rooting for you when the rest of the world seems to be against you?  If you're a social introvert, you might like hanging out with people but at the end of the day you might want some time to recharge your batteries and take stock of what you've achieved throughout your day.  What do you do with your spare time?  Reflecting with a higher being may be a way for you to help make decisions that plague you during your waking hours.

Only all I see when I'm tucked up snug in my sheets
All I breathe is the love you give to me
Won't you stay, won't you stay a little longer
While my heart awakes to the soothing of your voice
Won't you hold me close in your arms tonight
In the safety of my dreams
I let you come to me with eyes closed
Mind open, oh oh, mind open, oh oh, mind open, mind open

What do you see when you close your eyes?
Depending on how I'm feeling I can see a whole myriad of things.  They could be memories of things that have happened from my past, or something as recent as earlier in the day or potential scenarios of situations that are yet to occur.  Being able to breathe in love when you need it (even when you don't think you need it, nobody can survive without it, let's be honest) can make all the difference to knowing how love can work in your life.  If you are able to keep your mind open and allow things to come to you, whether you have summoned them or not, you will be able to see more with your eyes closed, than you would with your eyes open.  I really believe in the idea of having your eyes closed, but an open mind.

I'm a little bit of a fruitcake
Range from vanilla to chocolate sauce 
Add some coconut milk for good measure
And a big heart for the cross
I'm amazed by Him everyday
He speaks to me in every way
And I adore him but my spare time is meant for Him only

Are you a little bit of a fruitcake?
You might have so many different flavours that are part of your genetic makeup, but you could also choose how those different flavours taste depending on whatever other condiments you choose to add.  What's in your mix?  I think if you are able to find ways to feel comfortable with you are, what your flavours are and what tastes people should come to expect from you, there should be no major problems that you should face in life.  However, I do feel that people of colour experience so much more discrimination because of the their skin colour, and even my own friends of the fairer persuasion and the milky complexion, will never really be able to walk in my shoes, but they want to learn and that's a huge difference.  That's all the difference in the world right?  The fact that you should be able to want to learn about others, to understand people who are different to you, to understand how despite our differences, we are more the same than ever.  This is what I hear the most from Him when I devote my spare time to Him only.  Make a difference in the world to bring people together, rather than separated from His love.  Easy to say but hard to do right?  That remains the challenge I am willing to take on board for Him.

All I see, when I'm tucked up snug in my sheets
All I breathe is the love you give to me 
Won't you stay, won't you stay a little longer
While my heart awakes to the soothing of your voice
Won't you hold me close in your arms tonight
In the safety of my dreams
I'll let you come to me with eyes closed

I think in the times when I have needed to hear the soothing of His voice, it has come to me when I have been able to close my eyes and open my mind.  When I use my human ears to hear Him, it isn't enough.  But I am able to push my mind up towards heaven, together with my heart and my soul and see far more than my human eyes could ever contain.  Dreams are a great space in which to receive messages from Him.  There are never more calming moments than when you are able to get a good night's sleep and hear Him speak through you and to you so that your heart stays focused on fulfilling His promise.  What are you willing to do for yourself and others when your eyes are closed and your mind is open?

Now I'm standing here
Begging for you to come
Won't you come save me right now
Feel my heart beat like a drum
My spirit's good I'm a lioness
A royal born from the dark you believe
I believe in you, so come and save me right now

Even when I stand in all my weakest of times, I will not hide who I truly am.
We need to remember that if we don't feel comfortable being vulnerable in front of others, we only need to trust who we can feel that we can be vulnerable with.  Trust and faith are really hard concepts to master, within oneself and also to be placed in others.  Do you surround yourself with good people that you trust and have faith in?

I hope that the times when your heart beats like a drum, that the rhythm is able to calm itself and keep you steady when you are faced by obstacles and challenges that make you question your beliefs and values.  I also hope that learning to have faith in yourself too, is something that you are able to take away from having someone believe in you.  In the event that you fall or need some respite, you only need to call out.  He hears you the most when you cry won't you stay a little longer while my heart awakes, won't you hold me . . .

Sunday, 19 February 2017

Four seasons in one day. . .

When one day feels four seasons all at once. . . 

Four seasons in one day
Lying in the depths of your imagination
Worlds above and worlds below
The sun shines on the black clouds hanging over the domain

What do you feel or see in the depths of your imagination?  It might feel like you can't make sense of what your emotions put you through in one day.  Maybe you're trying to control your emotions so much that you forget what you are meant to be feeling.  This is because you put restrictions on yourself so much in order to control what is bursting to resist being contained in your skin.  We become more conscious of what is above us, what lies below us.  Our sense of depth perception may become skewed by activities or events that throw us off centre.  How are you prepared to deal with us and how does the sun look hanging over the domain?

Even when you're feeling warm
The temperature could drop away
Like four seasons in one day

What warmth you felt may disappear as quickly as it arrived.  Why does warmth escape us so rapidly just when we need it the most?  Sometimes what we want and what we need doesn't match up.  What are you prepared to do in order to survive four seasons in one day?  What do you do when you are hot and need to be cooled down straight away?  How are we able to adjust our body temperatures so that we are at our most comfortable?

Smiling as the shit comes down 
You can tell a man from what he has to say
Everything gets turned around
And I will risk my neck again, again

How often do you put your neck out for someone? You might be willing to take the risk, especially if you think you see the benefits of what it means to really do good for someone else, for others on a regular basis, because you know that you have gifts and talents that need to be shared with them.  I often think about not so much about what people say, but more about how they say it.  Tone is everything.  The facial expressions that accompany what they say, the tone of their voice, the hand gestures they make - it's all relative or it's all relatively connected.  Just depends really.

You can take me where you will
Up the creek and through the mill
Like all the things you can't explain
Four seasons in one day

How many explanations for various things have you been given?
When someone chooses to take you on a journey, they can either take the scenic route or take you straight to the destination.  If they take the scenic route, it's because they want to share landmarks with you and have some knowledge about those landmarks that they want to share with you, to show how much they know about their own surroundings if not the wider world.  Another explanation could be that the scenic route is preferable when they want to delay the inevitable and choose not to go straight to the destination.  Preferring instead to just be able to spend time with you and look at beautiful things together.  Sometimes we don't need to explain ourselves in those moments.  Just being near each other is fine.

Blood dries up
Like rain, like rain
Fills my cup
Like four seasons in one day

What blood have you spilled to be here?  Does your cup overflow with blessings or burdens?  When we go through difficult times, we need to remember that they don't last forever.  When I think there being four seasons in one day, it reminds me of the weather here in Auckland, where you think for sure it will be a sunny day and then it starts to pelt down with rain later in the day.  Sometimes we can't rely on weather forecasts, because they almost seem not to be as reliable as they used to be.  Is this because of global warming?  What other external influences affect the weather at your place?

It's doesn't pay to make predictions
Sleeping on an unmade bed 
Finding out wherever there is comfort there is pain
Only one step away
Like four seasons in one day

Wherever there is comfort there is pain.
No truer words could be spoken.
The duality of how things are in this world lead us to think that just when we think we are in some kind of space, the rug can be pulled out from beneath us and we're not so surefooted about where we are.  If we become familiar with the knowledge that everything we have is fleeting, that everyone we know will soon disappear because nothing is meant to last in this earthly realm, then wouldn't that make you think that much more about the decisions that you make about the choices that are on offer?  What if you aren't happy with the choices that you are faced with. Can you create your own choices?  Can you create your own outcomes.  I think we sometimes forget that we have the power to create as much of what we want for ourselves, for ourselves.  We must remember that everything that we have ever wanted can change in the blink of an eye.  It could all change simply as only one step away, like four seasons in one day. . . 

Wednesday, 15 February 2017

We're in this love together. . .

All the reassurance you need to know about being in love together. . . 
Rest in peace Mr. Al Jarreau - thank you for the music. . . 

It's like a diamond ring
It's a precious thing
And we never lose it
It's like a favourite song we love to sing
Ev'rytime we hear the music

When you are in love, all you can think about is just how good you feel.
Love makes everything feel better, because you now have someone to share things with, to share experiences with and just live life with.  You understand how precious being in love with this person is because it feels like a diamond ring, something that you must protect and you know that it is valuable, other people might want it, but you know that it belongs to you and you alone.  When someone you love sings your favourite song with you, there are associated memories with this song and when you both hear that song again, you can recall the other time you last sang it together.  Well, that's what I love most about my favourite songs anyway.  What do you do?

And we're in this love together
We got the kind that lasts forever 
We're in this love together
And like berries on the vine
It gets sweeter all the time

I thought I had a love that would last forever.  But it wasn't meant to be.  He was taken from me.
But death will do that to you.  But you can live in memories and play them back in your mind.  You can be reminded of things that you once shared when life presents you with opportunities to relive them on your own, or with someone else.  It's hard to think about the possibility of opening your heart to somebody new.   Sometimes I think I know, other times I'm not so sure.  But there is no expiry date for grief is there?  Nobody is able to tell you what an acceptable mourning period will be, because it's nobody's journey but your own.  What is it like to have the kind of love that lasts forever?

It's like a rainy night and candlelight
And ooh it's so romantic
We got the whole thing working out so right
And it's just the way we planned it

We know that rainy nights and candlelight aren't a good mix, unless the candlelight has some shelter from the rain.  Can you recall all of the rainy nights that have had any significance to you?  I can remember some memorable times.  And they were all sorts of different types of rainy nights too.  Can you recall all of the different occasions where candlelight has featured in your memories?  Sometimes the best times are the unplanned moments.  Have you ever tried to plan anything and then things didn't work out as you wanted?  Those might be blessings in disguise or maybe there is another version of you living in an alternate reality that you're not even aware about.

And we're in this love together
We got the kind that lasts forever 
We're in this love together
And like berries on the vine
It gets sweeter all the time

Do the berries get sweeter on the vine because of all the time it hangs there?  Do we need to wait and be patient with our love so that it matures over time?  Nobody likes berries that aren't sweet or don't taste sweet enough.  This is what patience does to us though right?  When we are able to master the time it takes to wait, without watching the hands of the clock tick away, we are able to accept that good things will come our way because we believe it to be so.  What are you hoping will last forever?  Do you know yourself well enough to know what needs to happen to be in any type of love together with someone?

Don't you know we're in this love together
We got the kind that lasts forever
We're in this love together
We got the kind that will last forever and evermore

Things that last forever and evermore, may not be destined to be so in this earthly realm.
We talk about forever and evermore, but nobody really knows what that means until we ourselves live forever and evermore, or people live long enough to remember us.  That's how our memories stay intact when we die right?  That there are people left behind that will remember us and know how much we meant to them, that we left a legacy behind that is worth remembering.

Don't you know we're in this love together
We got the kind that lasts forever
We're in this love together. . . 

I hope that whatever love you are in, that you are with them, and in this, together.
The kind of love that we hope lasts forever, depends on a whole host of factors that may be both beyond our control and beyond our reach, but still relies on a promise made that we think about and cherish until it can be so.  I hope that if you are longing for a love like this, that it finds its way to you when you least expect it.  Just go about living your life and let life introduce you to new people and experiences that can bring you strength, comfort, happiness, joy, wonder and maybe even throw in a few surprises along the way.  Even if you doubt yourself and don't think that you're quite cut out for romantic love, there is still the love that can be shared between human beings that brings forth our empathy for each other, because in case you're wondering, don't you know we're in this love together. . . 

Tuesday, 7 February 2017

Trust in you. . .

When all I need to do is trust in you. . . 

Letting go of every single dream
I lay each one down at Your feet
Every moment of my wandering
Never changes what You see
I try to win this war I confess 
My hands are weary, I need Your rest
Mighty warrior, king of the fight
No matter what I face, You're by my side

I never knew what it meant to really take hold of my dreams until I had failed to reach them.  I held onto them so tightly for fear of having them not come true or not knowing what to do with myself should they slip through my grasp.  I smile to myself when I think about all of the distractions that I allow to take me away from my purpose and focus.  Because when I spend time away from what needs to get done, I will always be guided back to what I need to do.  I think about all of the biblical characters who were called to do some great feat that they thought was far beyond their calling, far beyond their human comprehension.  The true rest that we think we will find in this world, we never will.  I guess this is what they mean when they say that it is only when we die, that we will have eternal peace.  I'm not saying that we should be in a hurry to end our lives, but rather, we should live our lives to the fullest so that when it is our time to leave this earth, that we have done all that we could to help others and leave them better than we found them.  Fix the broken ones if you can, but know that they can only fix themselves in the long run.  It's the only for people to learn how to self generate in this current generation.

When you don't move the mountains
I'm needing you to move
When you don't part the waters
I wish I could walk through
When you don't give the answers
As I cry out to you
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in you

Often what we want and what we are meant to do can be completely different things.
When we become still in the moment we find ourselves facing our toughest challenges, so we need to really focus on what it is that we are meant to decide.  When the universe doesn't bend to our will, is this because there are things that we are meant to do before things flow easily to its place and we arrive where we need to?  I sometimes think, if so many people cry out to You, what does that collection of voices sound like?  What is probably so deafening to us, must seem like music to Your ears.  Amidst all of the noise, You can probably make out each and every individual who seeks You in their hours of need.  Trust is such a hard thing to come by.  When people place trust in other humans to get by in life and then they are disappointed, it is no wonder that building trust again, gaining that trust that was betrayed can be really hard.  What progress you think you might have made, can seem to elude you again when you least expect it.

Truth is you know what tomorrow brings
There's not a day ahead you have not seen
So let all things be my life and breath
I want what you want Lord and nothing less

How many more times do we steer clear from You before we realise and come to know that being close to You is all we need to do?  I reflect sometimes when I am at my weakest point.  This could be when I have given so much and there is absolutely nothing left in the tank.  You go through cycles of self loathing because you're not really thinking at all about how much pain you are going through, but more that you hate seeing yourself like this and don't like what you see in the mirror.  As much as people see all of the trappings of your success and think that you're so lucky and that you have it made, they will never really know what you are going through because they don't really want to understand.  I have been having lots of conversations with friends, where they openly agree that people only want to find out things about you so that they can label you into categories that help them to make sense of who they think you are, rather than try to understand you for who you want to be.

You are the strength and comfort
You are my steady hand
You are my firm foundation
The rock on which I stand
Your ways are always higher
Your plans are always good
There's not a place where I'll go
You've not already stood

Man being of the flesh, means that when we die, our flesh erodes and we cannot count on them being able to sustain us in our times of need.  We enter the world alone and we leave this world alone.  I don't mean to sound melancholy.  I'm just stating facts.  I think the older we get, we accept a certain amount of matter-of-factness that being a young child doesn't understand because there are so many possibilities.  It is important to know if you are able to believe in something greater than man; whether it be a higher being or other forces that aren't human to help you transcend out of your earthly form.  Being able to visualise where He has been and how He has survived those different planes, makes me hopeful for a future that we cannot begin to fathom right now.

When you don't move the mountains
I'm needing you to move
When you don't part the waters
I wish I could walk through
When you don't give the answers
As I cry out to you
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in you
I will trust in you
I will trust in you
I will trust in you. . . 

I hope that my soul finds peace soon.
At my job people openly make jokes about me not having enough sleep and working so hard.  I don' expect them to understand how I live my life and what decisions I face or what I do for my family and people who rely on me.  They only see what they want to see anyway and that's perfectly fine.  Strong people shrug things off and carry on regardless of what is thrown at them.  What can you do right?  I think what you can do is not rage against the machine as much.  If you find yourself at a crossroads in your life, and wondering what you should be doing, take a moment to stand in that fork in the road and consider carefully what path to take.  Have a good long look about what is to come, try and see as far as possible what you are expected to undertake and what you are expected to sacrifice.  If things or people do not move the way you want them to, when you don't get the answers to your questions as quickly as you would like, just trust in the moment that in time all will be revealed.  As much as people will reassure you that they are there for you, sometimes those things can't be guaranteed.  So what can you do?  I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in you. . . 

Better be home soon. . .

When you know that you better be home soon. . . 

Somewhere deep inside
Something's got a hold on you
And it's pushing me aside
See it stretch on forever

What has got a hold of you?  When we find ourselves being pushed away by individuals who would have normally placed all of themselves in you, invested their time and energy into you, there will be questions that loom large in your mind.  Did you do anything to push them away?  What has shifted?  When the person pushing you away doesn't realise that they are doing so, it might backfire in your direction if you choose to point this out.  So what do you do?  

And I know I'm right 
For the first time in my life
That's why I tell you
You better be home soon

We might spend a large part of our adult lives anticipating the moments when we will be right.
We learn from an early age, that being right and being the only person who is right in a room full of people who are wrong, may contribute to making us feel more important about ourselves, and reassure us about how people perceive us.  When we find ourselves in situations where we quickly learn that being right isn't the thing to strive to be, in fact, it's the ultimate faux pas, then we must be prepared for when it is time to return home to lick our wounds.

Stripping back the coats
Of lies and deception
Back to nothingness
Like a week in the desert

How many coats of lies and deception do you wear?  We might wear these coats during the seasons of the year where they will bring us down, make us regret why we put on these layers because we think they protect us, when really, by wearing them it just makes us work that much harder to ensure that we keep track of our lies and who we have deceived and why.  That feeling of emptiness that you are feeling is a void that doesn't necessarily need to filled in a hurry.  In fact, you should think quite carefully and consider what it is that you want to do with your life.  Whether returning home is the thing to do or not.

So don't say no
Don't say nothing's wrong
Cause when you get back home
Maybe I'll be gone

We might tell people that nothing is wrong with our lives, because they might ask us how we are only out of polite conversation, to make small talk.  Because goodness we could do with some big talk about the small things that keep going wrong in our lives.  Why do we pretend that things are fine when they aren't?  Do we find ourselves surrounded by people who threaten our peace of mind and are toxic for us?  Whatever your situation is, remember to take some time out for yourself.  If you can't do that physically then set aside some space in your mind where people can't get to you.  That much you do owe yourself.

It would cause me pain
If we were to end it
But I could start again
You can depend on it

What promises have you been faced with lately?  Have they been consistently broken?  Are you expected to keep promises that feel false to you?  What kind of pain are you trying to avoid?  We can all too often think too much about what we are going through, but rarely become still and really take on board what we are feeling and how this sense of stillness can contribute to a more peaceful way of life that nurtures your heart, mind, body and spirit.  If things were to start again, like some magical reset button, how much could you depend on it?

I know I'm right
For the first time in my life
That's why I tell you
You better be home soon
That's why I tell you
You better be home soon. . . 

I hope that you follow your heart.
Sometimes we associate home with a physical place that we go to lay our heads at night.  But we forget that the home that we must nurture, is the one within ourselves.  When we focus on looking after ourselves, the calmness that lives within us that can permeate the chaos that threatens to overwhelm us, it is only then that you can be home.  That's why I tell you, you better be home soon. . . 

Wednesday, 1 February 2017

One . . .

This blog post is dedicated to all of us, because now more than ever, we must be one. . . 

Billions live their lives
Now Mohammed, Krishna, or the Buddha are the way
Still some believe it's right to say
In the name of Jesus when you pray

We are a humankind of seven billion
So many different races and religions
And it all comes down to one

It has been really difficult to watch global news lately.  I can't understand why people are being persecuted because of who they choose to worship.  I was raised a Christian and still practise the rites within this religion.  I have friends from all different types of religion and I have always been fascinated to learn about their beliefs and hearing them explain how they serve their higher being and why they believe.  Although people can debate about which one is the "true religion", that has never really been a focus for me.  Instead I marvel at the beauty of these beliefs, because I see in the eyes of those believers, how they have been touched by Mohammed, Allah, Krishna, Buddha or God.

Some say God's a Him
Still many believe that He is a Her
Does God live in our hearts?
Or is She sometimes out there in the universe

I've been taught to believe that God is a Him.  But I think He incorporates both genders and no genders simultaneously.  He can be nurturing and caring like a Her, equally on par with all the stereotypical male qualities as well.  When you think about God does gender play a factor at all?  As part of the Holy Trinity, knowing God as the Father means that as the head of the household, of your household, rely on Him to guide you in all major decision making, as the Son, rely on Him to be who you care for like you would your own child and as the Holy Spirit, know that you will take Him with you wherever you go.  Surely this is how you would know if God lived in your heart?  Even throughout your day when at your lowest, She may be out there waiting for you and you will recognise Her in the faces of people you meet.

How far will we have to go before we learn the lesson?
Gandhi was a Hindu
Martin Luther King a Christian
Regardless of religion, they knew love was the mission
And it all comes down to one

With some luminary visionaries of previous generations, who do we have to rely on to show us the lessons that we must learn?  Is love the mission in your life?  If it isn't, it should be.  I'm not referring to the romantic love that automatically springs to mind.  I'm talking about the love that you have for your fellow man, fellow woman, fellow human being that may be going through far greater struggles that you will never know.  Why?  Because despite how stories are reported to us, we must not only question how much of it is true, but we must also check whether what we are seeing will not only be our first world problems, but will in fact have mass global impact that may severely impact generations to come, generations that we may never live long enough to see and generations that will look back and blame us for not acting in their best interests, right now.

Is there no God at all?
Or a pantheon of gods up in the sky
We can heal our broken hearts
If we give up the desire to be right

I have slowly been learning that if the mission is love, then being right isn't the sole purpose of this mission.  I am letting go of what I have always thought to be right, to give up the desire to be right, but instead focus on what is right for everyone.  What are the best outcomes for the people that trust us to do right by them and to help them?  We sometimes forget that even though we may not know all of the people in the world, but all of our actions, or lack of action can have an impact on the rest of the world, just as their actions or lack of action has an impact on the rest of us.  How can we heal our broken hearts?  We need to fix these broken hearts in order to maintain our focus on our mission of love.

We are a humankind of seven billion
So many different races and religions
And we all want the same things
Health, Love, Prosperity and Peace
Tolerance is the seed
And the gift of pure acceptance is the tree

We need to see the end result in our minds so that we stay motivated to make things happen.  It is scary to think that all of the things that we take for granted, our basic human rights, are not coming under fire, coming under scrutiny, all because greed has become the seed and the gift of pure wealth is the tree.  I now know that money does grows on trees, because greed is the seed from whence it came.  No wonder health, love, prosperity and peace find it hard to grow.  Prosperity in this sense to me means lands of plenty that yield food to feed so many.  Setting political parties and religious differences aside - don't we all want the same things?  Why are things more complicated than they have to be?

Whether you are brown, yellow, black or white
Man with a husband or a woman with a wife
We can debate until the end of time who is wrong or right
Or we can see ourselves as one
Cause it all comes down to love

I hope we can figure out in time what would it take to bring us altogether.
What common causes can we work collectively and stand up together for so that we can agree that our humanity is not only important to preserve, but that if we let the wrong things cloud our judgement and take centre stage, we lose sight of what we need to do not only for ourselves, but for others, for all of us.  Because even if we feel like we can't do anything on our own, because we are only one, if love remains our mission, all we need to do is see ourselves as one, cause it all comes down to love. . .