Saturday, 2 April 2016

Exhale (shoop shoop). . .

I have many wonderful memories of this song.  It belongs to the movie soundtrack of one of my all-time favourite movies - Waiting to exhale starring Whitney Houston, Angela Bassett, Lela Rochon, Loretta Devine.  There are some heavy hitting actors in it too, but at the time of the movie's release in 1995, I didn't watch it for them.  I remember watching this movie before Christmas that same year with my college friends - it was my first year at university and it was the chick flick to round off a year with new friends.  I wouldn't have guessed that those girls would very much stay a part of my life and grow to have families of their own and careers - much like the women we watched in that film.

Everyone falls in love sometimes
Sometimes it's wrong and sometimes it's right
For every win, someone must fail
But there comes a point when, when we exhale

I guess that's the tricky thing about lve isn't it?  You don't know whether it's wrong or right until something happens that forces you to either confront his or her feelings or actions - that then become the catalyst for your own feelings or actions.  Why is it that someone needs to win while someone else fails?  Can't we all be winners?  It has to do with the competition design doesn't it?  Like we have to conform to society dictating what is considered the norm and if we deviate from that and choose not to engage - then we must be crazy.  In fact, all we're doing is taking ourselves off the grid and taking the time to exhale.

Sometimes you'll laugh, sometimes you'll cry
Life never tells us the reason why
When you've got friends to wish you well
You'll find a point when, when you will exhale

Do you have real friends?  I'm talking about the kind of friends that not only know you inside out but know can anticipate what you do and can read your face like a book.  You may come across so many people in your life that you don't know whether those friends are there for a season or for a reason - you won't know until things happen and your friendships are tested.  I think friendships need to be tested at times, because you get to know if you have real friends or not.  Good friends let you laugh and cry and do those things with you together.  Good friends also let you breathe around them when you're busy pretending to so many things to so many other people that rely on you for practically everything.

Hearts are often broken
When there are words unspoken
And your soul bears answers to your prayers
If you're searching a place you know
A familiar face, somewhere to go
You should look inside yourself
You're halfway there. . . 

Our natural inclination when we are either physically or emotionally hurt is to run to a familiar face or find some safe haven to find solace, comfort and to rebuild our sense of self.  But sometimes it's not external factors that we need to be looking at - but rather - it's the internal.  We need to dig deeper within ourselves and think about ways that we can learn how to self-manage, learn how to get on our own feet, not because we don't want to be a nuisance to others, but because as humans we are designed to learn how to be adaptable and how to function when we need to progress our pathways to achieve goals.  So rather than looking elsewhere for validation and wasting your precious time trying to impress others, look inside yourself first and just work on you.

Shoop, shoop, shoop
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop (yeah)
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop
(All you got to say is shoo be doop)
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop (Shoo be doop)
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop
Shoo Be Doo. . .

I hope that you can step back, get off the grid, take a seat and reflect on your current life and savour all of the things that make it great.  I hope that you continue to surround yourself with the right people. cherish the ones who are always there for you and know what you need, just when you need it.  This life that we live wasn't meant to be easy, but we don't need to make it hard for ourselves either.  I hope that you know, when you can finally let go of what holds you back and realise that you can find a point where you will exhale. . .