Monday, 4 January 2016

Realize. . .

Take time to realize
That your warmth is crashing down on in
Take time to realize
That I am on your side
Didn't I, didn't I tell you?

Have you ever taken the time to realise your true feelings about someone?  I watched Friends with benefits last night starring Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake (yes I know, I don't really watch movies as much as the average person I guess) but despite it being your unconventional love story, it has that realisation moment where the two key characters both realise that they love each other, something you kind of secretly hoped would happen and you're also glad that things work out in the end.  Letting someone know that you are on their side can be challenging when you need to be able to "show" them to some extent what being on their side means.  Would they understand what you meant?

But I can't spell it out for you
No it's never gonna be that simple
No, I can't spell it out for you

I've blogged about Colbie Caillat before (see Try).  Do you think that it's hard to spell things out for someone because you're afraid of the rejection if they don't feel the same or because you're kind of out of practice and don't know how to be clear about your feelings (especially if you're not in the habit of expressing how you feel about someone, trying to articulate how they make you feel).  I have been fascinated with this notion of how people make you feel - because sometimes I think people are completely unaware of what it is they give out, do or say that will ingratiate themselves to you.  Maybe you can't spell things out because you're not a very good speller I guess, so have trouble recognising how the letters form together in a way that makes a word, that forms a word that has proper lexical meaning.

If you just realize what I just realized
Then we'd be perfect for each other
And we'll never find another
Just realize what I've realized
We'd never have to wonder if
We missed out on each other now

Mutual realisation.  I guess this only happens when the connection you share with someone is so intense that you would realise things at the same time.  Would it be as simple as it is shown in the music video?  Would you rush to write out your feelings only to deliver them in a letter in person?  When was the last time you had written a letter like that?  The good thing about writing your feelings out in such a way is to see what you feel looks like.  When you read the thoughts aloud how does it make you feel?

Take time to realize
Oh-oh, I'm on your side
Didn't I, didn't I tell you?
Take time to realize
This all can pass you by
Didn't I tell you?

Have you had to tell someone constantly that you are on their side?  Why would they need that much reassurance that you are on their side?  Is this because they have never had someone care for them that much so you would have to prove it by writing them a letter?  I have come across people like that in my past who have had to be constantly reassured.  It has made me think about how broken they were and how much harder I had to work to make them understand that I wouldn't hurt them the same way, that I would be careful and understand how fragile they were and that if they chose to take a chance on love again with me, that I would be upfront with them about my feelings at all times.

It's not the same
No, it's never the same
If you don't feel it too
If you meet me halfway
It could be the same for you

I hope that when the chance comes for you to spill the beans about your true feelings for someone, that you feel safe enough for yourself too, to take a chance on love.  I mean if you have been hurt in the past because you've been open and honest with your feelings and then not had them reciprocated - it doesn't mean that you've failed - au contraire mon ami.  In fact, it means that it doesn't matter how many times you get knocked back from people when you tell them how you feel; it's how you pick yourself up and prepare to tell the next person who comes into your life who makes you feel loved.  You might be surprised that when you do reveal your feelings that you might meet someone else who feels the same and meets you halfway because they also realize, realize, realize, realize. . .