Saturday, 12 December 2015

Sweet disposition. . .

This blog post is dedicated to anyone on last chances, the home stretch, hanging on the edge. . . 

I have about 94 drafts of music blog posts waiting for me to complete them (in fact, they're crying out to be released) as well song requests and song endorsements, but I find myself drawn to this song today.  I've heard it played in so many movies or tv series during certain scenes like a video montage, and I've only just heard it again today while listening to the Eat, Pray, Love soundtrack, one of my favourite films about rediscovering yourself again after a traumatic or life-altering experience.

Sweet disposition
Never too soon
Oh, reckless abandon
Like no one's watching you

I've been talking about dispositions a lot this year and in different contexts.  For my job I talk about learning dispositions, multicultural dispositions, basically having an attitude to being open to learning something about something or someone that is vitally important to transforming either yourself or others around you.  I have reflected on the year that was and thought long and hard really about how many occasions I could have been more reckless and acted with abandon (I have done so much more in the past than in my recent past) and I think it's because I'm conscious that I think no one is watching me, when in fact, there are people watching me all the time - so call me paranoid, but I don't feel like I can be as reckless or wanton as I want to be, take that how you will.

A moment of love, a dream, a laugh, a kiss, a cry, 
Our rights, our wrongs, 
A moment of love, a dream, a laugh
A moment of love, a dream, a laugh

What are moments of love these days?  There are so many definitions and understandings of what they are that if you're going to engage in these moments with someone, you better make sure that they understand that you're on the same page,  There's nothing worse than speaking of love and you're actually not even on the same page because you're speaking from totally different books, so your stories will be completely different, they won't be in harmony, they won't be in sync, in fact they will make a very confused story that doesn't make sense from beginning to end, but may have some coincidental chance happenings that you might think is totally fine and acceptable.

So stay there cos I'll be coming over
Cause our blood's still young
It's so young, it runs
Won't stop 'til it's over
Won't stop to surrender

We need to keep hustling in this life.  There are too few opportunities because life is hard like that, so in essence we must kick some doors down or climb through some windows, basically create our own opportunities for success and fulfilment.  Have you had many people come over to help you through your difficult challenges in your life?  Are you able to sustain yourself, work together until you can conquer all of the demons that may threaten to consume your sanity and rob you of any happiness that you totally deserve but are quite willing or unknowingly allowing to slip through your fingers?  Pay close attention to what's going on in your life - either you're creating the drama you're living in or you're surrounded by people who are bringing it to your table.  Sort it out, make sure it's over.

Songs of desperation
I played them for you

I don't know if I played you those songs so that you could have a listen to what these songs sounded like being played back to you.  Did you realise that these songs are reflections of what's going on with you?  I guess you were too busy being so absorbed in your own world, self absorbed in your own problems, that you didn't realise that things were happening around you, that the problems can escalate without so much as a word or signal, but in fact, by you not taking a long hard look at yourself in the mirror to see - you would've seen me standing behind you all along, waiting for you to wake up to yourself.

Won't stop 'til it's over
Won't stop 'til it's over
Won't stop 'til it's over
Won't stop to surrender. . . 

Don't wait for me to play these desperation songs for you when you want to hear them.  I may not be around to play them when you need to hear them. . .