Wednesday, 11 November 2015

Love alone. . .

Nobody likes to be alone
when you fall down and life gets hard
Oh but it's easier to be alone
To know love and feel it gone

I can fully understand why you would want to be alone. because it may seem easier.
Being hurt is hard to process, I mean it's not an enjoyable feeling so why would you put yourself through the heartache and pain.  I don't generally think that most people would enjoy the self-denial of pain to the extreme of a masochist either, but there is (in my opinion) a sense of learning about yourself by going through the pain, especially when it's inflicted by others, intentionally or unintentionally.  Have you ever known love and then felt it the most (or the absence of it) when it's gone?

Mmm, mmm

All my friends have been telling me

Telling me that you're no good
And babe I'm starting to believe
Cause the more I love, the more you leave me alone

Friends tell you what you need to hear, not necessarily what you want to hear.
Of course they don't know what you feel when you are with someone who makes you feel.  I guess it's not because they force you to feel, but because you have allowed them to enter some small part of your heart, that you have allowed to touch it and grab hold of it, claiming some small piece of your heart so that when you see their face again, it's hard to not deny them that opportunity to occupy it and get comfortable in it.  Of course when the imbalance occurs - when you start to love them more than they love you - then they will start to feel suffocated and want to get away from you, as far and as quickly as possible.  What is this you think?  Some kind of warped sense of reverse psychology - where if you tell someone that you love them, then they automatically push you away?  I guess it depends on whether you allow yourself to be pushed away.

Mmm, mmm

I've been waiting all my life
For somebody to rescue me
Oh but this path that I choose to take
is walked alone more easily
Do I keep on moving on?
Giving up and letting go of love?

You will probably find yourself coming across different and varied pathways for love.  There will be opportunities to explore in so many contexts and in so many ways that make you question more about yourself than the other people you become involved in.  I mean, do you even need to be rescued?  I think you will find that most of the time, you've been the one doing all the rescuing, but you never realised it until you've finished rescuing the other party.  I'm not a fan of waiting all your life for someone either, because it tells me that you're putting your life on hold, missing out on learning about those opportunities to love when it comes your way because you're holding out for an ideal that may never come.  Don't get me wrong - I'm not saying you should settle either, I guess all I'm saying is that you need to keep moving on and you need to be able to give up and let go of love when you need to - for your own sake.

Now love is a simple thing
Or when it's right it should be
Oh but I have yet to find 
the real thing, the simple kind

Has love ever been easy for you?  Has it ever been a simple thing?  I'm starting to believe that the greatest love stories of our time - both fictional and non-fictional are all fundamentally flawed because they are all strewn with drama and complications that negate love being simple.  What type of kindness are you expecting to find?  I imagine it is the unconditional kindness that is rare like some gem that is hard to mine, I mean the irony is that if it was so simple, then wouldn't it be easy for everyone to have the real thing?

I just keep on singing my song, dreaming my dreams and walking alone 
Until the right one comes, who can sing along
Can sing along
Who can sing along to my song

I automatically think about Happy Feet and the way in which the penguins try to match each other's heart song throughout the movie.  I think I have come across a few people who sing along to my heart songs when I have needed someone to respond to me.  A crazy thing happens too; I find that I have different heart songs for different people and it makes me question how I can connect with so many different people on so many different levels.  I think when you truly and deeply connect with someone, it is very easy to sing along to each other's songs, until you find a common song that becomes our song.  How many songs do you sing along to?  What types of songs are they?  Does there even need to be a right one, but more about the right fit?  Because the right fit happens with the right people at the right times - often beyond your control, often against your will, and most often with your heart for sure.


Nobody likes to be alone

When you fall down and life gets hard. . . 

I hope that when you are alone that you learn from it.  I hope that the solitude that greets you there doesn't necessarily make you question whether you will be alone for the rest of your life, but I would rather encourage you to enjoy the pain and heartache of being alone so that once you come across love again, rather than giving up and letting go, you give in and let love in :-)