Sunday, 25 October 2015

Trouble me. . .

To anyone who doesn't want to trouble anybody with their worries, you can trouble me :-)

I remember coming across this track in a movie I had watched.  I can't recall exactly what the movie is but there was a scene in the movie that this song featured in; it was quite subtle but it resonated quite strongly with me because it was the wedding waltz or some kind of dedication that the groom was doing for the bride, in any case, that's where I heard it, I guess I'm just trying to remember.

Trouble me, disturb me with all your cares and your worries
(Trouble me) on the days when you feel spent
Why let your shoulders bend underneath this burden when my back is sturdy and strong?
Trouble me

The lyrics are pretty self-explanatory.  They speak about (at least from the singer's perspective) the reassurance that they are giving to a friend or someone in need who doesn't want to offload, vent or share their issues with anyone.  In Aotearoa New Zealand, we probably have the highest suicide rate amongst Māori and Pacific Island youth, and we have seen an increasing number of young people take their own lives because they have been pushed to the brink of no return, no escape from the pressures that they feel that they can't share with their loved ones, friends and people that they can trust. 

(Speak to me), don't mislead me, the calm I feel means a storm is swelling
(Speak to me), there's no telling where it starts or how it ends 
(Speak to me), why are you building this thick brick wall to defend me
(Speak to me),When your silence is my greatest fear?
Why let your shoulders bend underneath this burden when my back is sturdy and strong?
Speak to me

I guess it's when you're silent that I am worried, because you know you can just say anything and it will be fine.  I mean, the last thing you want is people to be judgemental and offer you advice about things they know nothing about.  Don't worry about me either, I have a knack for knowing when to be in touch with you and know exactly what you need - just someone to listen to you and be there for you when you need someone to ease the burden that you carry.  I tell you not to worry about me because I think I have been through everything humanly possible that has helped me to build the level of resilience that I know you can have too.  So don't ever think that you are being a burden to me by offloading your problems, woes, worries and troubles to me - because that's what friends do for each other :-)

(Let me) have a look inside these eyes while I'm learning
(Let me) please don't hide them just because of tears
(Let me) send you off to sleep with a "There, there, now stop your turning and tossing"
(Let me) know where the hurt is and how to heal

Spare, spare me? Don't spare me anything . . . troubling. . . 

You're probably wondering - who can you turn to for help to heal?  You might not even recognise that you need healing until the hurt and pain starts to kick in, or you start crying for no reason.  It's important to recognise where the hurt and pain originates from, to locate the source so that you can begin to think of some steps to being the healing process.  I often think that it is difficult to help people when they need it most, when they are in denial that they could use some support, don't want to ask for it but you can clearly see that they need, or don't realise what damage they're causing to themselves by being in difficult situations.  I don't know about you, but I wouldn't have anyone spare me anything.  I would prefer to know every detail so that we can start to move forward.

(Trouble me), disturb me with all your cares and your worries
(Speak to me) and let our words build a shelter from the storm
(Let me) and lastly let me know what I can mend
There's more, honestly, than my sweet friend, you can see
Trust is what I'm offering if you trouble me. . . 

I hope that you will let me know what you need to mend.  Of course the greatest learning will come from you figuring out what needs to be mended for yourself.  I'm just here if you need someone to help you build a shelter from a storm, someone to sit with you and talk things through in that shelter so that it's a safe haven for you and that we can find ways to address the storm and how to survive it.  

I hope that you know, that you can accept the trust that I'm placing in you, because of the trust that I'm offering you.  When you're ready, you know how to find me :-)