August is a particularly tough month.
4th is my birthday, 11th is our wedding anniversary and 19th is your birthday.
I guess it's timely that winter in Aotearoa falls during August.
After tomorrow I can look forward to Spring.
But until then, I have this song to remember you by - The Zephyr Song by The Red Hot Chili Peppers.
This was one of your favourite karaoke songs.
I used to laugh a lot when you sang it, because if you sang it at a karaoke bar, people never suspected that you could sing pitch perfect, with all of the right intonation, complete with facial expressions to boot. It was one of your many signature songs.
When I asked you how you came by learning it, you mentioned that it was one of the songs you learned in the 2XL band while working for FLEP (Family Life Education Pasifika). You really loved working there. I met nearly all of your former work colleagues over the years and they would confirm the stories that you shared together. I think Tofiga's "Aunty Tala" had remnants of your character "Venus" in "Aue Whakapō" - one of the many plays that you and your colleagues wrote, played music for and acted in to teach young New Zealand about sexual health in your many tours around the country. I would laugh when you reminisced about how school students would come up to you and hug you because you reminded them of one of their transgender aunties - and then they were surprised when you spoke, that you were actually acting. You were definitely an undercover talented actor.
Pick it up
If not too strong for you
Take a piece
And pass it on
I remember all of the fond memories I had with you today.
You loved your birthday. You were almost like a little kid.
It was a wonder that we didn't have children - because you were such a big baby yourself - you always wanted me to pamper you and I didn't mind. It made me happy to know that you needed me.
I will pick up what you passed on to me.
It's not too strong.
If anything it's made me more strong.
I will pass on that strength to others now when they need it most.
Fly away on my zephyr,
I feel it more than ever
And in this perfect weather,
We'll find a place together
No matter how hectic the world gets and how much pressure, all I need to do is think about you and I'm transported to my zephyr, with you there making me laugh with all of your jokes and enjoying each other's company. I think about how in my zephyr, you're anxious to show me all of the places you've explored without me, but keen to show me. You always wanted to show me the new things you had discovered, you always wanted to be the first to know about things - before I even had a chance to explore it. That was just your way and I loved that about you.
In the water where I center my emotion
All the world can pass me by
Fly away on a zephyr
We'll find a place together. . .
We're gonna live forever. . .
Thanks for the memories, they will live forever :-)